One Good Question

by Chad Kohlmeyer, Pinnacle West Associate

Many leaders feel their primary job is to provide answers to every challenge and question — and thus fail their leadership responsibilities. Choosing to answer too quickly can both close the conversation and bore people who have real ideas, vision, and gifts from Spirit. This scenario may sound familiar —

The team meeting had gone in circles for 30 minutes.

You could feel the frustration rising, and the same comments were being repeated. The same solutions are being given.

Then someone asked a question that paused the conversation and shifted the energy and focus of the remainder of the meeting.

Not an answer, but one good question.

A single question can redirect a conversation in a needed way or inspire a group anew. Especially at the right moment. A good question will till the soil of assumptions and engage people in important ways. A good question can:

Help people feel seen

Lower defensiveness

Invite participation

Communicate curiosity instead of control

A good question can also bring a team meeting back to a shared purpose. For example, the basic questions of “what are we trying to accomplish here?” or “if we do this, what might shift in a faithful direction?” can:

Re-anchor a conversation in a larger vision instead of the usual pitfalls of personal preferences, politics, or personalities.

A good question can draw people together in important ways.

A good question is formed intentionally. I offer these as important qualities:

Open - invite discernment by not asking a yes/no question.

Honest - offer genuine curiosity with what is before the group.

Future-oriented - invite thinking about what is possible.

Intentional- what might lower defensiveness and invite curiosity.

The next time you feel that a gathering is stuck, try this as a leader: Invite a pause, offering one minute of silent reflection for participants. Instead of jumping right back in where you left off, interject a question for the group to answer that you have discerned, trusting that the right question can open a future or create healthy dialogue that the room may not have realized was possible.

One Good Question is a compelling and important strategy because of two things:

Culture doesn’t always need to change through a grand strategy. It is hopeful because one courageous pause and question,

asked at the right moment, can make as much of a difference as years of strategy.

Church leadership isn’t about knowing everything or having all the answers. It trusts that Spirit is at work in a

community and that wisdom is shared. One good question trusts that the future can be discovered together, and that

a gathering has all the gifts it needs to move forward faithfully.

Feeling stuck? Try the discernment of one good question and see what gift might be waiting for you.