Good Goodbyes Lead to Healthy Hellos for Church Staff

by Rev. Caitlin Trussell, Pinnacle West Associate

When I was but a pastor-in-training wrapping up my year of internship, my pastoral supervisor gave me a very short book called Running Through the Thistles: Terminating a Ministerial Call with a Parish by Roy M. Oswald. The general gist was to say a good goodbye so that my successor had a chance for a healthy hello and so I had a chance at a healthy hello in my new congregation. The encouragement was to bless folks simultaneously to their blessing of me as we said farewell.

This simple instruction of mutual blessing has served my congregation many times in parish ministry as staff move on to new work or retirement adventures. We do things like encourage folks in the congregation to fill out “Gratitude and Godspeed” cards for the person leaving. There are boxes and blank cards made available for this purpose. We organize potlucks, coffees, or other gatherings to celebrate their work among us—occasionally our more introverted staff decline these festivities which we honor. We give our staff sending blessings in worship and in staff meetings so their departure is ritualized as a normal holy thing and we are reminded of God’s presence with us through the big feels that accompany changes in relationships.

At a recent Congregation Council meeting, we were discussing our recent staff changes and someone commented about how much she appreciates the way our congregation says goodbye to staff. She and a friend of hers in another church were talking about how a key program staff person had left without a collective way for the congregation to say goodbye and bless them, which felt difficult.

Our goodbyes lay the foundation for healthy succession in staff positions. We honor the person and their work among us, which preemptively honors the next person who steps into that role—a holy process that mirrors our faith in a God who brings life through death and hope through change.

If you are interested in hearing more about how Pinnacle West Leadership Associates can help you in any church transitions, please feel free to visit our website for more information.