I Know This Guy… I Know This Story
By Bill Ireland, Pinnacle Associate
In the June 3, 2025 edition of The Athletic, Jourdan Rodrigue penned a captivating article about the relationship between Chris Peterson, former head football coach at Boise State and the University of Washington, and Sean McVay, the head coach of the Los Angeles Rams.
As Rodrigue tells it, in January 2023, Peterson had seen clips of a news conference given by McVay. The Rams had just concluded a disastrous season in 2022. Watching the broadcast, Peterson thought McVay looked hollowed out and fatigued. His voice was hoarse. In the news conference, McVay went so far as to suggest that he might leave coaching altogether. Peterson immediately saw himself in McVay and thought to himself: “Oh my stars, I know this guy. I know this story.” Despite his overwhelming success as a coach, Peterson remembered how, in the pursuit of winning, he almost lost himself. So, he picked up the phone and called McVay. This initial contact led to many, many other conversations, and as a result, McVay renewed his commitment to coaching and went about his work differently.
Great story!
Beyond the “feel good” vibe of this article, it also contained some gems of wisdom that are invaluable for ministers and congregational leaders. Here are a few I gleaned:
To begin, Peterson related that, despite his success at Boise State, he felt that he was “sliding backwards,” becoming someone he didn’t like. He responded to this set of circumstances by resigning from Boise State to become the head coach at the University of Washington. He thought to himself: “OK, maybe if I throw away my problems and take on a new set of problems, that will solve my problem.” As ministers, when things get tough where we are and our enthusiasm for the work wanes, we sometimes follow Peterson’s example and move elsewhere. Sometimes a move elsewhere does indeed revive our spirits. New challenges generate new energy. Nevertheless, we have to acknowledge that a “new set of problems,” will not resolve our struggles. A change of scenery won’t do unless there’s a change of heart. Often our biggest problems are not out there but in here—within the soul.
Here's another. Describing the hyper-competitive nature of coaching and competing at the highest level, Peterson noted: “The arena can squeeze you and narrow you so quickly to certainly a lesser version—or the worst version—of yourself extremely easily.” Congregational ministry is not for the faint of heart; the pressure and the demands are unrelenting. We’re never really “off” and over time the stress works on us. Instead of the work bringing out our best, it can bring out our worst. We can become hypercritical, and our anger and frustration can boil over at the most inopportune time. We get tired and stay tired. Peterson was fortunate enough to be able to step back and work on himself. His actions in this regard speak to the importance of recognizing when we need some time and space and then taking it. The question we must ask ourselves is, “How do I get better?” In that light, Peterson told McVay if he ever got back into coaching, he would put up a sign in his office that asked: “Who am I becoming as result of this chase?” Good question! What we make of our work is not as important as what our work makes of us.
Recalling one of his conversations with Peterson, McVay said he frequently leans on something Peterson had said. It was this threefold mantra: “Stay present. Stay grateful. Keep doing hard things.” Wise counsel!
Stay present. Lean into where we are. Be where our feet are, paying attention to who or what is right in front of us.
Stay grateful. Giving thanks for whatever in the day makes us laugh, feeling rewarded and loved, and being awed by the wonder all around us will temper the acid of cynicism.
Keep doing hard things. We are at our best when something asks the best of us. Hard things sharpen our gifts. A challenge overcome gets coded into the memory bank and makes us better able to confront the next one.
Obviously, at the most basic level, Rodrigue’s piece underscores the importance of strong professional relationships. Having friends and colleagues who can identify with our struggles, share their wisdom, and provide needed encouragement and support is invaluable. I would venture that all of us have been in places where such friendships have kept us sane and helped us find our way to the other side. Anyone who sees themselves in us because our story is their story, too—we can count on people like that to help us be our best.
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