Your Church’s Alternative Message
by Rev. Mark E. Tidsworth, Founder and Team Leader
When I talk to Christians who are struggling with their faith, one of the first things I ask them is, “Were you raised in a fear-the-world church or a love-your-neighbor church?” —David French, NY Times Column
““Contempt is sulfuric acid for love.” It is the most poisonous of all relationship killers, destroying psychological, emotional, and physical health. Contempt is poisonous because it conveys disgust. It can only be destructive.”—John Gottman, The Gottman Institute
Wait, we didn’t set out to design an alternative message, one that’s out of sync with our current cultural context. Our aspiration as churches is not to be different simply for the sake of being different. We are not the original rebels of the spiritual world, trying to become as unconventional as possible, for some reason. That’s not the purpose of church.
No… but here we are. The message of Christ, the practice of our faith, is growing more counter-cultural and unconventional every day in 2025 America. Certain politicians have seized this cultural moment, playing on the rampant fear in our society, ramping up the sense of threat. To combat these perceived threats, certain politicians are employing the most corrosive approach available to the situation: contempt. See John Gottman’s quote above. Contempt is poison for relationships, community, and bridge-building.
What are the other cultural themes of the day? What is held up by misguided leaders as the way forward? Well, we could name themes like vindictiveness, retribution, contempt, power, greed, domination, isolation, and disrespect. Magnifying the perceived threats in the world, promoting this cadre of responses as the way forward is becoming culturally mainstream.
So, before moving further ahead, we have to become really clear about The Way of Jesus. What then is the Way of Jesus about? What is the message of our faith and churches in this context? What are the relevant themes of the gospel for this time and place? Well, we might hold up gospel themes like forgiveness, grace, respect, empowerment, liberation, generosity, and collaboration. These gospel-centered themes form a very different way of interacting in this current socio-political environment than what is popular among many. How clear is your church on its mission and calling? How clear is your church on its identity, including its core commitments? I hope your church did this identity clarification work before 2025, positioning you for sharing your message of hope. If not, we can talk about how to do this.
When we know who we are and what we are about, then the following three insights are worth engaging as a church, leading to a moment of decision about how to be in this moment.
We need an alternative narrative in this current situation.
What are the popular themes we are encouraged to pursue here in this USA by some leaders? Contempt, as aforementioned, is perhaps the most striking and deleterious, with the others mentioned above on the list as well. When laid out like this, who would want to pursue this way of being? We readily recognize the way of death, not life, embedded here.
Surely there’s a better way, a way forward based on love, with its varied expressions. Perhaps the short list noted above (forgiveness, grace, respect, empowerment, liberation, generosity, and collaboration) is a place to start. Surely churches have a message, embody a message, with more hope than destruction embedded within. We need an alternative narrative in this current situation.
We must accept that the Way of Jesus, as described in this article, is counter-cultural with a sizable segment of our society.
Why is this significant? Churches who existed before the year 2000, remember what it’s like to be the cultural center of their communities, enjoying much social clout as organizations. For some, recognizing and accepting that their place in their communities has shifted, feels like a loss, like a demotion, one might say. Accepting that churches are on the periphery of our communities while we are used to being the center of our communities is no small shift. At the same time, when we do the work required to update our self-understandings as churches, we are liberated to be alive in the present, embodying the good news of the gospel in culturally relevant ways in 2025.
We need churches to proactively find their voices, claiming their spiritual authority to embody and proclaim another better way, the Way of Jesus.
God doesn’t call us to action without preparation. God has already prepared God’s Church to serve in God’s vineyard (this world). All that spiritual formation we’ve been doing over the course of time… was not for naught. We are prepared, and are able to receive further preparation in the moment as we go.
So, I don’t know about you, but I’ve had enough of being the fearful church in the corner, defensive postured toward our communities. We need proactive churches, stepping out and speaking into these moments, sharing a better way.
May God help us live into the moments to which we are called through Jesus our Lord.